What's Your Divorce Story? Strategic Planning in Divorce.

One of the skills a good divorce lawyer learns is how to craft a case strategy almost as soon as a client walks in the door.  There are a lot of moving pieces to this skill but it is the one thing you can't learn on the internet or from reading books in the law library.

In fact, it's the one thing many attorneys (and yes, even judges) never understand or take the time to develop.  To some, it comes naturally.  Others have to work harder for it.  Study, practice a skill over and over again until it comes right, watch You Tube videos until blue in the face.  But it isn't out of anyone's reach.   It just involves a mix of critical thinking, acting and storytelling that is unique to every lawyer.

Here is the anatomy of a divorce case:

First, client comes in and tells me his/her story.  Often, we file or respond to court papers with that story.  I do my best to stay objective. The facts the client gives me at that point are the only ones I have.  Facts change as the case goes on.

Next, the other side files a paper that tells their story.  My client gets all up in arms and is hurt/angry/sad or all of the above.  He or she tells me what they think of the other side's story, how it isn't true, they're making it up, etc., etc.  I tell them, "Fine, the next thing we do is start getting the facts.  That really helps me know what the other side's story really is."

So we do.

We ask questions.  Lots of them.  Questions in writing.  Questions in formal settings with court reporters.  Sometimes questions in hearings.  We collect a lot of paper, and I examine it.  And this is where the case strategy really starts to take shape.  It's not that I don't believe my clients.  I do.  It's not that I disbelieve the other side completely.  I don't. But a very wise man once told me I had to be careful not to take on the mantra of my clients.  The longer I practice law, the more I know he was right.

The facts give me the strategy.  The fill in the factual blanks in my client's story.  They help me explain to him or her how some of the things he or she wants to claim or do really don't make sense, based on the facts.  These are not always easy conversations.  But if they stick with me, we may formally change the story based on the facts.  We may alter the course of the litigation ship so we have a better chance of winning if we have to go to trial.

Doing this helps us either win or settle on the best terms possible.  And it's one reason my services stand out.

Divorce Law in Maryland: Stepping Out of the Past

Let's face it, Maryland divorce law has been just a little bit archaic.  For the longest time, we were one of the last states in the country to have "irreconcilable differences" as an actual ground for divorce.  But now, that has changed.  SB 472, making "mutual consent" a grounds for divorce has passed and will be effective October 1, 2015.  Bring out the fireworks, folks!  Next, let's see what we can do to decriminalize adultery.  We could be well on our way to the 20th Century!

Unbundled Legal Services Launch

We've been waiting for five long years to haul out our old business plan for limited scope representation (a/k/a unbundled legal services), dust it off, and launch it.

The time has finally come!  Check out our press release in CityBizList:

CityBizList Press Release

For years lawyers have been offering some limited scope services online, largely for uncontested cases, but Maryland Family Law Firm, L.L.C. is the first firm in Maryland to offer a comprehensive, staged process to help middle income pro se (or self-represented) litigants to manage costs and, at the same time, obtain quality legal services to help them through the divorce process.

For more information on menu-driven legal services, go to our new page: http://marylandfamilylawfirm.com/unbundled

Being A Wholehearted Divorce Lawyer

Like many lawyers I went into the work of lawyering in large part to contribute to my community . . . to help others.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not a total altruist.  For anyone who isn't sure of it, this is not the Dawn Elaine Bowie, Esq. Free Legal Clinic.  I do have to make a living, just like everyone else.

A lot of days, though, my primary goal can be hard to keep in front of me.  This business is not for the faint of heart, especially the practice of family law.   People can be mean, especially in this business.  One lawyer told me that family law attorneys are the oncologists of the legal profession . . . nobody's ever happy no matter how well you do the job.  He may have been on to something.

It doesn't help when colleagues and judges can add to the stress with their own steady stream of criticism (they do).  Or when clients fire me because [I didn't do what they told me to do] [I didn't do a perfect job according to them] [they believed the other lawyer who bad-mouthed me] [they just didn't want to pay me]. When I was a new lawyer, I handled the stress by erecting a coat of armor that I thought would keep me protected from the daily barbs, but no surprise, all it did was keep the human being I am hidden from the folks I work with.  Now, I've learned to just go out into the arena every day, whether I win or lose, and allow my heart to get broken.  Allow myself to make mistakes (Yes, Virginia, even lawyers make mistakes, only the ones that lie say they don't).  If I'm not a wholehearted human being, I won't have empathy for the pain my clients bring to me every day.  And that empathy is as great a gift as my legal knowledge, skill and experience.