Answer:
It depends. It depends a lot on expectations. What do you expect it to accomplish for you? It also depends on how it's done. I am a firm believer in lawyer-assisted mediation. A former boss put it this way: in mediation, the agreement is the mediator's client. When that is the case, the mediator won't tell either you or the other side what are your obligations or your rights. He or she won't give you the range of legal options or possibilities; won't set out the pros and cons of different choices; won't explain where the landmines may be hiding. Those things are the job of your lawyer, and that of the other side. If you find a lawyer who never talks about mediation but wants to head straight for the courtroom, watch out. You are about to lose a ton of money and probably get a less-than-ideal result. On the other hand, if your lawyer wants to sit down at the table to negotiate before there is enough factual information for both you and the other side to make informed choices, beware of that too.
More often than not mediation is helpful in some way, at some point in your divorce or custody case. But here is what it is not:
- It is not a way to force mean people to be kind to one another;
- It is not a solution for all divorce or custody cases - the fact is, some people won't listen to any kind of reason and the only way they know how to "negotiate" is by bullying the other side into doing what they want you to do. People like that need the court and a judge to tell them what to do or they won't do it. In fact, even then, they may not do it;
- It is not a substitute for the careful drafting of a valid, enforceable, written legal agreement, most often known as a Marital Settlement (or Parenting) Agreement;
- It is not a substitute for private consultation with an attorney acting as your advocate to help you to be fully informed of your options and choices in your divorce or custody case.
If you are interested in a consultation to find out if we can help you with either full-service or limited scope representation, call us or send us an email today. Or visit our website at: www.marylandfamilylawfirm.com.
